Why is it that some mom’s groups it seems like you need a job interview to get into them? Or that when you finally find one that when you get there and park, get your stroller, your kid, and ready to play and be social that you all the sudden are being watched.  And if you don’t do the right thing, have your kid wear, eat the right foods, or anything they are horrified.

You quickly try to clean them up to fix things up so that you look all put together and will be accepted but they have already “labeled” you.  You feel ashamed and slink quietly into the corner of the group just hoping that they won’t cast you out. 

Snide comments about parenting are made, what people feed their kids, how others handle public tantrums, and where you choose to send your kids to school.  All of these things can be hurtful to some parents if not talked about properly. 

So how do you know if you are being a good mom? Figure out what works best for your kids and you and learn to trust yourself is the best way, say moms who’ve been around the block once or twice.  You are being a good mother, even if you sometimes doubt it!  I know sometimes that other mom’s can make us feel inadequate by some of the comments they might make.  For example “What kind of mom feeds her kid processed food that leaves an orange stain?”.  Who are these mom’s to openly chastise other mom’s for making choices for themselves and their kids? 

Motherhood has become a spectator sport.  The bar for motherhood today seems impossibly to high.  It use to be that a Supermom was one who went to work and had kids and kept the house clean.  Now it’s trickled into, “I breastfed until my kid was 20 and now I feed him only organics, take him to piano, soccer, and oh by the way, I’m a size 6 and my hair always looks great!  Compairing yourself to that one supermom who seems to be able to do it all is damaging and not a goal worth aiming for.  “The mom who looks completely put together and is baking 100 cupcakes for the school, running the fund-raiser, and her own business is exhausted. She is either employing some help of she is about to fall apart.  You don’t want to aspire to something that is impossible to maintain.

With all the expert parenting information avalible to us today you think us mothers we’d feel well-informed. But sometimes when you are at the pediatrician’s office and you are reading all the wonderful parenting articles about all the wonderful parenting you should do-never yell or tell your child was bad, but rather that they made a poor choice. Then they get into the whole natural food thing and how you should never serve SpagehettiO’s. I think we learn to distrust ourselves.

Real life mom’s get stressed and lose patiences. Sometimes, we yell. But one of the thing those articles never mention is that children are very resilient. Doing what you believe is best for your children and your family makes you a good mom, no matter if it fits anyone else’s standard. So just don’t worry about what others think just what your kids think.

You are in your home. The noise level is high. You have one child crying and another child scattering all the toys over the floor. Peace at home. Yea right! The meaning of peace radically changes the day you become a parent. You may ask yourself, “How can a harmless creation of God take away my peace?” The bible mentions peace is a fruit of the spirit. Peace is a gift from God. Stop and ask God for peace during the chaotic times. Take a minute to receive God’s peace amongst the chaos. This will help you feel less anxious and more serene. Take a moment to teach children to stop and pray in the middle of hectic and out of control moments. The type of peace they yearn for can only come from God. So ask him for it.

Ask your children, “Are there times you feel like everything around you is just crazy? Or you feel so confused and can’t think clearly?” Show them how to take a moment during the day when things seem out of control to stop and pray. Pray for peace, calmness and tranquility. Discuss what calm means for your children. Later in the day ask how praying helped them.

Parenthood comes with a price. Before parenthood, my husband and I had the flexibility to do what we pleased, when we pleased. Two kids later, we decided it was best if I took a leave of absence from my job in order to be at home and raise our children.

Love takes sacrifice. A sacrifice may mean temporarily scheduling life around nap times and school hours, or even putting a career on hold for a season. We know that sacrifice is a result from love. God displayed this through his son. He sacrificed his one and only son because he loves us so deeply. We can show our children that love can mean giving up some things in order to do good for others.

There are many orphanages with children who would love toys to play with and clothes to wear. Today, have a purging party for just a few minutes. First, have a discussion about what it means to sacrifice. Sacrifice means to give up something for the benefit of someone else. You can read John 3:16 aloud to them, and explain God’s own sacrifice. Then, explain that we are all God’s children and He asks us to love one another. Have your children choose a toy or clothing item to give away to a child who needs it. Find local groups that visit orphanages regularly and will help disperse your donated items.

God granted us the gift of parenthood when our children were born. Love is included in this gift. He created us to experience his unique love that bonds us as parents with our children. It’s in this love that we seek replenishment when we grow weary and drained from our parenting duties. 1 Corinthians 13:7 says, “Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” We can depend on our Heavenly Father’s love just as our children can depend on our love when they grow weary during life’s challenges. We can provide an environment where our children feel protected and can trust easily. Our children can experience God’s love as they receive it through us.

Take a moment to write a love letter to your children today. It could be a small note left in their lunch box or a tender hearted letter sealed in an envelope left on their pillow before bedtime. What do you love about your children? Follow-up and see if they received your note or letter. This may strike up some interesting conversations, or you may even get a big hug out of it.

As parents, it’s important to remember when we make mistakes and ask for God’s forgiveness, God’s grace is what sets us straight again. When we allow our children a do-over, we are nudging them along in the right direction. We can praise them when they do. A pat on the back, a hug, words of encouragement and a high five are ways to let them know, “You’re doing great”.

Parents, think about what your child has improved on. Maybe they’ve stopped whining, or they’ve begun doing chores without being told, or they’ve improved their school grades. Take a few minutes to let them know how proud you are and how they’re a much more responsible person now. Remind them how awesome God is to grant us do-over’s to allow us time to get it right and grow closer to Him.

Rules. They are everywhere. There are rules at home, rules at school, even rules at grocery stores. Rules are established to keep us safe and out of trouble. In fact, God gives us rules to help us because He loves us. It’s up to us to follow and obey them. God gives us rules so we may grow closer in our relationship with Him through trust and obedience. When we train our children by setting up household rules, we are establishing a relationship based on trust and obedience with them.

Talk to your children about the importance of rules. On the road today, ask your children to think of a very important rule either from home, school, or church. Tell them when you get to a red light, they all get to share their rule. Then when the light turns green, have them explain why that rule is important and what could happen if they didn’t follow that rule. After everyone’s shared, explain that by obeying rules, they’re obeying God. And this shows God how much we trust and love Him.