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Tag Archives: counseling

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People Pleaser

04 Friday Oct 2013

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counseling, People, recovering

People PleaserI

I admit it finally after years, finally recognizing it, and counseling that I am a people pleaser. This is something that is a hard thing for me some days to wrap my head around. You see I see myself a a strong person a fighter one that can handle things on my own.  So why do I need people to be happy with me and what I do?

Well for me this is a big issue.  I am really concerned what people think of almost all that I do, look like, and everything.  So this makes me try my best at everything.  I guess I have always been like this.  I can look back to even in High School and I thank my lucky stars my dad was a teacher because I could use his closet in his room and not my locker.  I would bring extra outfits to school because I didn’t know if I was wearing the right thing.  I wanted to be in fashion, have the right style, color, something that someone else wasn’t wearing, whatever it was.  I don’t know why I just wanted to be prepared.

I do this with my cooking and taking care of my home and family too.  Some days I work really hard at all these things so that I do so good at them but really I just want to make everyone happy.  I could be hurt, sick, tired but that would not matter because I have to please everyone.  I am always thinking and looking out for everyone in my life.

I know this is an issue for me and well I am trying to let go and work on this.  It is hard for me.  It is hard to feel like I am letting someone down or not pulling my weight.  I know this isn’t a bad thing and that I need to think of myself for once in my life.  I never have but I think it is time to learn.

Posted by michele343 | Filed under Uncategorized

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Love Ourselves

04 Friday Oct 2013

Posted by michele343 in Uncategorized

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counseling, Friendships, Groups, Judging, Love, Prayer, Relationships

These days I have been thinking can what can we do or what is the best thing to love ourselves or others?  If we actually love ourselves, first we would feel the need to not judge, compare, or criticize others.  How often do you feel or hear of someone being mean to someone else?  How often do you say ” Well, it’s just because they are insecure” or ” They may be intimidated by you”?  Well I think this or hear this from my husband all the time.  Really it is hard to hear or think these things when you know that others do these things to others everyday.  We give these answers to help give perspective and to try to help make us feel better or to make us feel right about a situation.  

 I have to ask myself everyday would a woman who is loved and who God made her to be treat others in a mean way?  Probably not. I feel that just like Christ’s example that we are not suppose to leave others out, make them feel bad, that there is no need to make yourself feel better than someone else.  I feel that we are to love others no matter what their shape, size, color, disability, or anything.  We are to love all because we were all made in Christ’s image.  

The sad reality to life is that we don’t do this. People don’t follow this and they do judge others. This really hurts people and is a huge reason that we don’t have many close relationships or trust people. When we can’t love ourselves and love others as Christ loved us then we are not following his word.  When we don’t we hurt the ones we want in our lives, the ones we have in our lives, and the ones we love.  

So, I think we should do whatever work we need to do, counseling, support groups, time in prayer, to figure out how to accept and love ourselves as the beautifully unique women God has made us to be. When we put God as the center of our lives and follow his example we will start to learn to love others and ourselves.  

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